ADHD Children: Tantrums Are Not Inevitable

Publié par Unknown on vendredi 28 mars 2014

By Leanna Rae Scott


What is now named Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (or ADHD) has been recognized, and perceived in many different ways, for probably hundreds of years. Stimulants were used for treating it more than seventy years ago. But I still believed about fifteen years ago that there really wasn't such a thing as ADHD and that it was probably just a way to excuse lazy parenting.

But then, in spite of my denial, my first two kids from my second marriage developed into pre-teens and developed problems in completing their school assignments, even as otherwise excellent students. These two children had always resisted doing anything they didn't like doing, and they had never cooperated by doing their fair allotment of the household chores as my older ten children had. Their floundering at school, though, was what caused me to belatedly get them in for thorough assessments, resulting in positive diagnoses for ADHD and ADD.

My daughter, the younger of the two, had ADHD, and Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD). Many parents with ODD children apparently give up on them, letting them ultimately be in charge of themselves. Though I felt like it, I refused to let my daughter be in full charge of herself because that would have increased her risk within the community. But she resisted every effort I made to be in charge of her.

My son's ADD didn't involve hyperactivity, and his symptoms weren't as much "in my face" as my daughter's were. Now that he's an adult, he doesn't think he's had ADD. I had ten non-ADHD kids in my first marriage, though, and because these two children were diagnosed after thorough medical assessments, I'm convinced they've both been afflicted with this ailment (as has been their father). I was so frustrated with all of the challenges these two children presented that I was quite willing to medicate them. They tried the whole gamut of medications but didn't like the side effects, and they wouldn't take them.

During a discussion I had with this son when he was a teenager-at a time I was highly frustrated because of his behaviors-I stated an observation that just then occurred to me. He didn't laugh, so I assumed he didn't appreciate the humor in my emphatic remark, "You, my son, are the second most annoying person that I've ever given birth to." He was. And his ADHD sister was definitely the first. For many years I despaired of them actually learning enough of the life skills I was teaching them so they could thrive, but they're both doing quite well now.

My ADHD children were quite the same as my others with one important aspect of discipline. My first five kids all threw tantrums...but my last eight didn't. My fifth, at fourteen months, was cured a week or so after I discovered what to change in my parenting style. What I had learned with him worked just as well with my ADHD kids as it did with the rest. You too can opt into a tantrum-free lifestyle, even with ADHD children.




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