Every one of my first five babies threw temper tantrums. When my fifth child was fourteen months of age, I learned what to improve in my parenting style so I could prevent any further tantrums from him. Within a week or so after this, he was entirely and forever free of tantrums. I then used my new-found skills with the rest of my children, all eight of them, from birth on. Not one of them ever threw a tantrum, not even the two with ADHD, one of whom also had severe Oppositional Defiant Disorder. As a young adult, this daughter recently stated, "I was an extremely, totally defiant child, but, through all the many years my mother and I struggled over which one of us was going to be in charge, I always loved the way she responded to my anger."
When I help other parents use my concepts to totally eliminate and totally prevent temper tantrums in their own children, I begin by teaching them the difference between Type-One and Type-Two tantrums. It's quite important to know what kind of tantrums one is trying to eliminate, because Type-Two temper tantrums need additional parenting techniques besides those needed in general for Type-One and Type-Two.
Type-One temper tantrums are true expressions of children's anger that have escalated to states of rage, sometimes to the extreme, or even to the maximum. These expressions of anger are ones that are out-of-control or nearly so. These types of temper tantrums happen naturally as things occur to make children angry.
Type-Two tantrums are expressions of anger (that could be genuine, unexaggerated, exaggerated, or potentially even totally fake) combined with conscious and deliberate attempts at intimidating or manipulating. These kinds of temper tantrums occur when children don't get what they want.
"Expert" temper tantrum advice has historically included a healthy amount of "ignore the tantrums." Actually, I should say an unhealthy amount, because that is faulty advice that I steadfastly followed when I was initially parenting my first five children. I did learn, ultimately, by eliminating the temper tantrums of my fifth child, that the process of ignoring tantrums was partly what was causing them. In fact, I believe that ignoring tantrums almost guarantees they will recur. Certainly, there are additional factors in the total prevention and total elimination of tantrums from the behavioral repertoires of children. These are elaborated on in my discussion of my methods, which I call, "Infant Anger Management." But it all begins with parents ending their ignoring-the-tantrums behaviors.
When I help other parents use my concepts to totally eliminate and totally prevent temper tantrums in their own children, I begin by teaching them the difference between Type-One and Type-Two tantrums. It's quite important to know what kind of tantrums one is trying to eliminate, because Type-Two temper tantrums need additional parenting techniques besides those needed in general for Type-One and Type-Two.
Type-One temper tantrums are true expressions of children's anger that have escalated to states of rage, sometimes to the extreme, or even to the maximum. These expressions of anger are ones that are out-of-control or nearly so. These types of temper tantrums happen naturally as things occur to make children angry.
Type-Two tantrums are expressions of anger (that could be genuine, unexaggerated, exaggerated, or potentially even totally fake) combined with conscious and deliberate attempts at intimidating or manipulating. These kinds of temper tantrums occur when children don't get what they want.
"Expert" temper tantrum advice has historically included a healthy amount of "ignore the tantrums." Actually, I should say an unhealthy amount, because that is faulty advice that I steadfastly followed when I was initially parenting my first five children. I did learn, ultimately, by eliminating the temper tantrums of my fifth child, that the process of ignoring tantrums was partly what was causing them. In fact, I believe that ignoring tantrums almost guarantees they will recur. Certainly, there are additional factors in the total prevention and total elimination of tantrums from the behavioral repertoires of children. These are elaborated on in my discussion of my methods, which I call, "Infant Anger Management." But it all begins with parents ending their ignoring-the-tantrums behaviors.
About the Author:
Learn more about the two types of temper tantrums.Eliminate tantrums . Visit Leanna Rae Scott's site to learn how to prevent temper tantrums.
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